Behavior is Connection

I will describe what it feels like to be in a self-contained classroom. As I have mentioned, you will need a

key to enter. Once the door is ajar, a sound is activated, alerting people of interest that the door is open.

To unlock, one must either push the button to enter the door or a code enters from inside the room to

disarm the door alarm. Initially, it seemed dramatic until I came across student elopement behavior.

When the alarm went unanswered, it automatically disarmed, and the student gained access to the

environment outside of the classroom. At first, I experienced a stress response: to run or not to run. I

engaged my deep breathing skills and began to process my options. With the help of self-regulation

techniques, I effectively communicated my needs with support, and the student was returned safely to

the classroom. The sheer embarrassment of the elopement made me think critically about the purpose

of the behavior and preparation for many more behaviors to come.

The behaviors experienced in a self-contained classroom feel overwhelming. Every student needs

something to help them feel regulated. They need additional support regulating their emotional distress

to overcome academic challenges and make progress. Acknowledging each behavioral manifestation as

an unmet need helps to promote a sense of safety in the classroom. I quickly realized teachers want

control of their classrooms. When students attend to the school and classroom expectations, it

increases their opportunities to access the curriculum, ask questions, and develop healthy relationships

in the academic environment. Unfortunately, students who experience emotional and behavioral

disorders need the rules accommodated to their needs, or they will feel dysregulated. Dysregulation can

lead to behavioral disruptions such as screaming, inappropriate language, tantrum behavior, property

destruction, physical aggression, self-harm, or elopement. Sometimes, it can be a culmination of all

behaviors happening at once or throughout the day.

When I see student behavior, I see the behavior as an opportunity for connection. The elopement

behavior indicates to me the student experienced an internal form of stress. As a response to the stress,

the student attempted to escape the environment. Clinical Psychologist Dr. Becky Kennedy described

the behavior as a “symptom.” She explains, “Behavioral issues are often a call for attention or

connection- if those needs are met, that cry for help is no longer necessary” (Kennedy, 2022, p. 74). Dr.

Brene Brown, a shame researcher, defines connection as “the energy that exists between people when

they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they

derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.” (Brown, 2020, p. 29). Thus, seeing problem

behaviors in my classroom is necessary to help me learn which behaviors to address and how to reframe

these behavioral experiences. Once reframed, I can help the student build resilience, access the

curriculum, and progress academically.

My research deepens my understanding of the brain and how it affects behavior. My self-contained

classroom is structured to increase opportunities for connection. Connection supports neuroplasticity.

“Neuroplasticity refers to the brain’s ability to relearn and transform itself when it recognizes the need

for adaptation” (Kennedy, 2022, p. 52). I like to brag to my students, saying they have never

encountered a teacher like me. School is a place for learning, and I love to learn. The essence of my

being comes from my desire to learn and utilize my acquired knowledge to promote my well-being and

the well-being of others. I encourage healthy relationship-building and foster academic achievement.

To a group of students who utilized their behaviors as a tool to manage their relationships and

emotional discomfort, I am a shock to the core. I encourage verbal communication to help facilitate

emotional exploration. I create opportunities for students to engage with one another in a free-operant

environment, meaning they have free access to fidget items, board games, Chromebook(s), or art

supplies to relate to one another. I contrived other opportunities for the environment, such as time

before school starts. During this time, students enjoy breakfast in the classroom while drinking tea or

hot chocolate and listening to their favorite music while socializing with their peers.

These contrived opportunities allow for access to behavioral observations, individual or group

interventions, and less rigor in structure in addressing maladaptive behaviors. I promote students

engaging in their maladaptive behaviors. Because I view behavior as a window, I can observe the

antecedent, behavior, and consequence in these free-operant environments to identify the appropriate

response strategy to help the student make desirable (healthy) changes. Sometimes, I teach the

required grade-level curriculum and notice how specific demands or instructions introduced in the

environment lead to stress-induced responses in students. Some students disrupt concentration by

fidgeting, twisting pencils, playing with school supplies, or even attempting to initiate conversations

during instruction. Simple redirection by verbalizing praise for student engagement can interrupt such

distractions.

However, some students have more significant conditioned behavioral responses to stress in the

academic environment. These students will have disruptive behaviors that not only interrupt instruction

but do not respond positively to redirection. Our support curriculum, Mindset, encourages teachers to

avoid power struggles; this looks like calling attention to negative behavior and threatening it with a

negative consequence or punishment. “If you do not stop x, I will do y.” Naturally, it would be easy to

assume the student is engaging in the behavior to challenge authority. Realistically, they are children,

and if they cannot engage in self-control to stop disrupting the environment, there is a need for

connection. The off-task behavior is communicating, “I cannot stop myself from doing this behavior. Can

you please attend to me to help me?” Strategies like break cards, letters, or journals can help facilitate

communication with teachers when students need emotional support.

How does that look? While teaching, I noticed some of my students engaging in disruptive behavior.

They talked while I instructed or engaged in other off-task behaviors like using paper to construct 3D

objects to propel my classroom toward other students. When I noticed the distractions, I encouraged

the students to raise their hands to communicate their distress. “Tell me what is on your mind.” I may

call attention to the student, like, “Hey, I notice you are balling up paper. What is going on?” However,

the response would almost always be “nothing,” or a student feeling courageous enough to verbalize

aggressively, “I do not know this! This is stupid! I am stupid! I hate school”.

Consequently, the student’s disruptive behavior would grow. Initially, I felt stressed about not

addressing each student’s emotional needs. I implemented a communication “mailing” system to help

students alert me when they need to discuss something personal that impacts their ability to engage

with the lesson. I encouraged students to write or draw how they felt, place the paper in an envelope,

and place it on my desk. Without delay, students began to express their contentions in the classroom

formally, and I used the feedback from the students to inform my classroom structure.

These students need more connection. They felt disconnected from the curriculum. Their behavioral

history has subjected them to experience more stress than the average student. The more frustrated

and stressed they felt from learning the material, the more they engaged in disruptive behaviors.

Ultimately, teachers began to feel disconnected. Some teachers avoided disruptive students, which

allowed them to remain unfocused, or they incited power struggles. Teachers disconnect from non-

compliant students and verbalize their intolerance for disrespect. The famous quote “Pick your battles”

is a response to noncompliance. When students feel the disconnect, though, they feel hurt or enraged.

“If we do not build a sturdy foundation with our kids – one based on trust, understanding, and curiosity

– then we have nothing keeping them attached to us” (Kennedy, 2022, p. 77). They will respond

emotionally to distress and disrupt the learning environment. Connection supports neuroplasticity and

helps the students learn other ways to regulate distress and meet their emotional needs. With trust,

understanding, and curiosity, they practice these skills in the classroom and access a healthy form of

reinforcement, reducing maladaptive behaviors.

Behavior is a window. When a student engages in disruptive, maladaptive behaviors in the classroom, it

is an alert to me to let me know the student needs connection. Introducing the importance of

communication in the classroom and creating a safe environment for students to explore helps to

reduce distractions in the learning environment. It is beneficial to increase opportunities for behavioral

engagement to identify students’ needs and offer the appropriate interventions to support them. For

example, the “mailing” system in my classroom created opportunities for communication between

myself and students. It allowed me to structure time to listen to student concerns and offer individual

support. Additionally, it reduced disruptions during instruction, increasing student engagement and

academic progress.

In my next blog, I will describe stress-inducing events in the academic environment and students’

respective behavioral responses. Then, I will describe effective techniques used to help students address

behavioral concerns and outcomes toward academic achievement. Thanks for your time! I hope to

speak with you soon.